Tag Archives: trials

Goodbye 2014!

Happy New Years!

Only a few days late.

I can safely say I have never valued a new year as much as I do this time around, 2014 was easily the hardest year of my life. It was just chock-full of change… and I don’t particularly enjoy change.

It ranged from heartbreak, death and losing people I loved- to family members, new friendships and incredible learning experiences. Though it was hard and I am still wondering how I survived with half of my sanity (ok ok.. maybe a fourth of my sanity) I wouldn’t have had it play out any other way.

As crazy events dragged me uuuuppp and ddoooowwnn the most wild emotional roller coaster, I learned more than I ever thought I could. It sounds super cheesy to say it all helped me find myself.. but it did. It also showed me that I will never fully “find myself” not til the day comes where I am old wrinkled and ready to head up the big white staircase. And no, silly, I’m not talking about the stairs in the DVF building. Though… maybe the stairway to heaven does look pretty similar.

Life is for learning, and we will each be learning until the day we die. I couldn’t be more grateful for all of the experiences- yucky and wonderful- that have brought me to the point I am at today. All it shows me is that God loves me and knows where I need to go, He knows a whole lot better than I do.

There have been two words on my mind A LOT since 2014 started coming to an end.

Talents and Trials.

These are two things that every single one of us has, and we can choose what we do with them and how we handle them. I also believe that they are two of the biggest character builders depending on how we utilize them.

This past year many of the exciting opportunities I had were because I decided to use some of my talents in different ways. I think at times it gets easy to not venture out of your comfort zone in fear of failure. But how will you ever grow if you aren’t allowing yourself to?

Not only did I have many exciting and fun opportunities from utilizing my talents; but I was able to reach out to people I never would have been able to otherwise. I made amazing friends and was able to bless their lives- even if just in the smallest way- because I didn’t hide my talents and abilities. If you think that you have a talent or gift that is unimportant or useless- think again! You weren’t made that way for nothing, so really consider what you can do to utilize it and to touch others lives for the better. For example.. if for some reason you are just so good at cleaning toilets, I have four! You would make me so happy if you came over and used your great ability! See, so worth it.

But in all seriousness- my whole life I had really been intrigued by fashion and beauty. And the last few years I have really enjoyed it and thrived in the artistic side of it. For a very long time I thought that I was prideful for enjoying fashion.. it must mean I’m a bad person or something! So.. I didn’t really do anything about it. Til the House of DVF casting started and I decided to apply on a whim, not thinking it would go anywhere. Well.. it went somewhere. Maybe not exactly where I thought it would go, but I can tell you that I can’t imagine where my life would be had I not tried to follow through with that talent of mine. However dumb, or bad I thought it was, I was so greatly blessed. I still can’t believe where my life has taken me since then.

I can also tell you that from using my talents.. a whole slew of trials tagged along. At first I was bitter about this. Why me? I won’t survive this. What do I even do?? It just didn’t make sense. And honestly it never would have made any sense had I not turned completely to God to get me through it all. It is funny to me that God is the not only the one who gets you out of trials.. but He is the one who gets you into them. There was a point in my life where I felt like maybe God didn’t love me and that was why he wanted to give me a hard time. But I soon came to realize that it was because He loved me that He gave me afflictions. He didn’t want me to stay where I was, because He knew I had the potential to learn, grow and become a better me. Now as I look back I also can see that He knew once I passed through my hardships that I would be a much happier girl. I don’t think I have ever been as happy as I am now! And I am so insanely grateful for everything I went through, and still go through. Because I know for a fact that there are always better things ahead.

Look at yourself and your talents and trials. What are you doing with what you’ve been dealt? Are you hiding them away, or are you sharing them? Please share them. It helps people like me know that I am not the only one trying to struggle by, we are all in the same boat. And we all have abilities and experiences we can use to help the people around us.

I’m going to share some of my favorite and not so favorite moments of 2014 with you now in photos. Lets see what I can rummage up.

I made new friendships, and met some amazingly talented people

I strengthened old friendships and had so much fun in the process.

I was able to spend a lot of quality time with my sweet family

I said goodbye to my baby brother for two years

Said goodbye to someone I planned on spending the rest of my life with

And had to say goodbye to my sweet sweet grandpa

Became an aunt to the best nephew in the world

I pretended to be a model

Brandon Cruz Photography

Lauren Lu Photography

Jordan Carli Photography for Jacobs Scarves

Vania Stoyanova Photography

Lauren Zurchin Photography

Also pretended to be on a reality tv show in New York

Made (or tried to make) some new art

Experienced so many beautiful places

Goodness. That was a lot. I doubt anyone enjoyed that or cringed as much as I did. So much good, so much bad. But I can’t help but smile at the beauty of it all and that I got to experience it.

I can’t wait for what 2015 has in store. Bring it on. I’m pretty sure I can handle whatever comes my way this time..I’ll keep my fingers crossed at least!

I know that the things I experienced were unique to me, but I sincerely believe that all of us travel through good and hard times. I also know that everyone has the capacity to learn so very much from whatever they face. I challenge you to embrace your talents gifts and skills this year, and to share your experiences with those around you. Step out of your comfort zone to be a better you, whether it be in your relationships, schooling, work or something completely different! And always keep your head up and remember there are always better things ahead than anything you leave behind.

Here’s to another great year… aahhhh!

Aaannd sorry I didn’t include any new photos and clothes. I decided to save those for my next post, where I will also talk about some things I learned from beautiful Kier from House of DVF.

Thanks for reading/ looking at so many never ending pictures that you probably could care less about!

Buh-bye for now.

Codi

The things that matter most.

3 Replies

Merry Christmas Eve! Or Happy Christmas Eve! Or as my dad would say “Wait, where is Christmas Adam?”

I’m still surprised it is Christmas tomorrow (or today depending when you’re reading this) and there is no snow.. I was just out playing in the sprinklers a few minutes ago. That’s a lie, but still.. I want some snow!

So this week was the Finale of House of DVF. I still can’t believe it is all over! The whole experience changed my life in so many ways. It was one of those pivotal moments that set me on a completely different path than I ever thought I would be on. I know the same goes for all of the other girls, and I am so grateful I had to opportunity to meet them. I am so excited for Brittany! She is going to be one aaammmaaazing Brand Ambassador!

She is perfect.

Also my whole outfit is Shabby Apple!

I’ll be writing about Brit and the finale in a later post! Today I am going to talk about my girl Lenore.

As I got to know the girls, I immediately felt a close bond with Lenore. I don’t know if this was because she is so personable and funny, or because I feel like her relationship with her family is similar to mine. Well, it is probably both reasons! She is also such a sincere and genuine person, she never could say anything rude or condescending about anyone; it is just not in her nature, she really cares about people. And I have a hunch that a big reason she is like this is because of her family.

Whoops my hand is photobombing!

When I met Lenore she mentioned how the first thing she was going to do once we were done filming was call her mom and tell her all about her day- because she is her best friend. I really admired that! I think it is such a rare thing to find people who have such close bonds with family. I know from my experience that a big reason I am who I am is because of my family. And I know that much of Lenore’s fabulous self must be a result of her sweet family as well.

I had to add this picture too because I found it online hahah.

Like Lenore, I’ve gone my whole life with the the greatest best friends in the world- my family! They have always been there for me through thick and thin. We’ve gone through struggles and yucky stuff, but that is what life is for. I could never imagine being without them. I have had people in my life who have tried to diminish my relationship with my family and the people I love. I’ve even put myself in situations where I take my family for granted. Though these things were not fun.. and I was really dumb.. I am glad I experienced them, so now I remember how valuable my loved ones truly are.

The last few months I have been really trying to find myself.. all while trying to date. It’s so strange to be living the single life again, and honestly I am not the best at balancing my priorities. I miss parts of being married.. I miss always having a companion. It’s been a struggle to try and take things slow and relaxed because I want more than anything to find the person I am supposed to end up with. I used to think I was such a patient person.. pppfffftt.. yeah right! It all sort of sucks (sort of = TOTALLY). But yesterday as I was trying to give myself a pep talk I remembered what got me through the horrible process of divorce- my family, and Christ. How dumb could I be? Once the divorce process was over I sort of just fell back into my old habits of trying to do things myself, and not relying so much on Christ. I also started spending tons and tons of time on dates, instead of with my family and close friends. Though this kept me distracted, it didn’t truly make me happy or complete. So I thought- why now, as I am in a tiny slump that doesn’t even compare to the suckiness (yes, it’s a word) of divorce, am I just relying on myself to get by?

I think at one time or another we all believe that we can overcome our trials and hard situations on our own. Or it is the opposite and you lose complete hope in yourself that you will ever get past what you are going through. I’ve experienced both of these. I am not saying that it is impossible to get over barriers on your own, or that there aren’t trials in life that will go on for looooong periods of time. But I do know that whenever I center my life, thoughts and actions around Christ, I am able to overcome anything and am never alone.

I am so grateful that we have Christmas to remind us of our elder brother Jesus Christ. Obviously I needed this reminder- that He lived so we can truly live and find happiness. Life gets busy and distracting, other times we get lazy or get into routines that don’t allow us time to think and study about what truly matters. It is sad that that is how life goes, because we should treat everyday like Christmas. We should always keep our loved ones as close as we do during the holidays. We should always have Christ and his example alive in our hearts and in our actions each day. And we should always have hope that if things are looking down, they will get better if you have your sights set on the right places.

I had the honor of snapping some photos in some cute clothes today. Although it looks like it was a nice warm day in April.. can someone tell Jack Frost we are waiting for him, and if he is any later he can consider himself fired?

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Shirt: Thrifted- Sorry it was a handmade find!

Tights: Merona

Shoes: Vince Camuto (old)

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Tights: Merona

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Coat: Vintage Makoff

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Shirt: Thrifted

Tights: Merona

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Tights: Merona

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Coat: Vintage Makoff

So there you have it. Some cute clothes. I really enjoy the holidays because it is also a prime time to wear pretty things!

But ultimately like I said before, the very best part of the holidays is Christ. Our Older brother, who lived and died for us all so we can learn, grow and find true happiness. Because of Him we have the chance to love and cherish our families, whoever they may be. For some it might be friends and others it might be relatives. But we should all remember who and what really matters. After all, in the end a pretty dress, a cool car, or a buttload of money isn’t going to matter. The relationships we had and the people we loved will be what counts. We should all treat every day of the year as if it were Christmas. And remember that when we let Him in to our lives we are NEVER alone, and can get through anything that comes our way.

Like C.S. Lewis so gracefully said:

“Look for Christ and you will find Him. And with Him, everything else.”

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Codi

Not Too Shabby

3 Replies

Hey, I am back!

And I am going back in time.. to when I got home from House of DVF.

I am going to be honest- keeping up with a blog is tough stuff for me. Especially when I am writing on the past and reflecting back on things that have already happened.. and were also rough on me. It is also hard with my school projects and photo gigs that are piling up like dirty laundry! Eeeek! I need a life manager, anyone interested in filling this position?? If so contact me at codineedsmajorhelp@aintnobodygottimefothat.com, thanks!

So. I am going to go ahead and start with my outfit deets from House of DVF. Just jumping right in.

I exited House of DVF in a whole lot of Shabby Apple goodness!

Sweater- Bielby sweater

Skirt- Bloom Skirt (in mint)

Is it so wrong that I just wore this outfit again this week, in the cold winter weather? No, the colors make me too happy, go away winter, no one likes you!

Shabby Apple is great for so many reasons. 1. It is all super modest and fashionable. I don’t have to worry about wearing anything under or over any of my Shabby Apple clothing. 2. It is owned and run by the SWEETEST people. They are super professional, kind and just plain awesome! 3. Um. Just go take a look for yourself. I have an eye on the Athelia Skirt right now.. hoping to wear it to my next royal ball of course!

Shabby Apple clothes have the tendency to make me feel like a princess..even when I am playing dress up in my room.

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

So go check them out and give them some love! Though I was sent home from House of DVF, at least I walked out in style!

Speaking of being sent home, I’d like to write a little love note to my girl Tiffani.

Tiffani went home on this last Sunday’s episode. I sure love this girl! I think we are soul sisters. I mean, not just because we were both grungy concert-attending teens at one point in our lives. But I also think we sort of have the same sense of humor. One of the times I was in NY to film I met up with Tiff one night to grab dinner. We went down to a little diner and talked about how we each had found out about House of DVF. Turns out we were the only two who found out about the opportunity from Craigslist and Facebook. So this must mean we are both very classy ladies.. or just very lucky haha! I think we are similar in the way that this opportunity was very unreal to us. From our upbringings, to where we live; I don’t think either of us had ever expected to get an opportunity like this in life ( at least not at this age). Something like this seemed almost unattainable, it was sort of like we had found a Golden Ticket!

Love this girl like a sister!

As we sat at the diner eating, we started coming up with ideas of funny things we wanted to do. Ok, so whenever something crazy happened we were supposed to let the producers know so they wouldn’t miss any good footage. Tiff and I decided it would be wise if we set up a little skit. We were going to call them and say something along the lines of “Woah, there is a huge fight going on right now on the 10th floor! Kier and Abs are having a legit sword fight. Brittany knocked Lenore out and Jinna is egging them on! Amanda is wrestling with Rhianna and Coco.. and we don’t even know why they are back.. and to top it off DVF is sitting in the middle of it all crying!!” Ok, maybe I elaborated that a bit.. but we were going to say something similar hahah. So then when the crew would come rushing up to the 10th floor of the hotel, Tiff and I would have a boombox set up playing some goofy song. And we would come out doing a choreographed dance in our footie pajamas. Oh my gosh, I’m still mad we never got to follow through with this plan. It would have been the best!! But let’s be honest, they would have cut the footage to make it look like we showed up to our first day of work in our footie pajamas, and it was super unprofessional of us. Then it would cut to a scene of me crying saying “Footie Pajamas are power!” I can just see it now!

After Tiffani and I ate we walked over to Rite Aid to get some snacks. We pulled around those funny little baskets and filled them with really healthy choices like chocolate candy and chips. We spent a good while looking at the cheap makeup and talked about life. I remember Tiff saying something about makeup, and she was going to make sure her makeup was flawless through the show so she could hopefully get some modeling gigs. Um, her makeup could be smeared all over her face and she would still look gorgeous! You New York people better utilize little Tiff’s gorgeous self for some modeling before she gets snatched right up by some big agency! If I lived in NY she would be my model of choice on the daily!

Why is she so perfect??

Tiff is also an AMAZING singer. Would you ever have guessed? She needs to record her stuff asap. You would all drool over her voice. I guess it’s just not fair she got blessed with so many great qualities. She’s only 19, and Tiff is going to go far in life!! I am so proud of her, and so grateful I got to know her and now have such a great friend; the little sister I never had!

Tiffani really made an impact on me when we were in the middle of filming. There was a moment off camera when she came up to me and gave me a big hug. She said something like “I’m so glad you’re here. This whole thing is going to be really hard and stressful. It is nice to know there is someone like you here I know will be there for me when things get tough.” Just that sentence made my whole day. It made me feel needed and important. Tiffani is the perfect example of someone who is taking control over where her life goes no matter what set of cards she is dealt. She is such sweet, beautiful girl and I am so excited to hear about her new adventure working at the DVF store!!

Go read her departure blog here. You won’t regret it!

Tiffani was on my mind a LOT once I got home from NY and started going through the bumpiest final patches of my marriage, and the last days spent with my grandpa before he passed. Watching Tiff’s successes and growth, I knew I could get through my trials as well and come out on top. My next post will be on these very personal and life changing trials I went through (and some rad leather bags that you will want to snatch right up), so make sure to check back next week!

Thanks for reading, til next time!

Love, Codi

i am codi

life, art, & fashion

Tag Archives: trials

Goodbye 2014!

The things that matter most.

Not Too Shabby