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I am still here! Let’s talk collaborations…

Goodbye 2014!

Happy New Years!

Only a few days late.

I can safely say I have never valued a new year as much as I do this time around, 2014 was easily the hardest year of my life. It was just chock-full of change… and I don’t particularly enjoy change.

It ranged from heartbreak, death and losing people I loved- to family members, new friendships and incredible learning experiences. Though it was hard and I am still wondering how I survived with half of my sanity (ok ok.. maybe a fourth of my sanity) I wouldn’t have had it play out any other way.

As crazy events dragged me uuuuppp and ddoooowwnn the most wild emotional roller coaster, I learned more than I ever thought I could. It sounds super cheesy to say it all helped me find myself.. but it did. It also showed me that I will never fully “find myself” not til the day comes where I am old wrinkled and ready to head up the big white staircase. And no, silly, I’m not talking about the stairs in the DVF building. Though… maybe the stairway to heaven does look pretty similar.

Life is for learning, and we will each be learning until the day we die. I couldn’t be more grateful for all of the experiences- yucky and wonderful- that have brought me to the point I am at today. All it shows me is that God loves me and knows where I need to go, He knows a whole lot better than I do.

There have been two words on my mind A LOT since 2014 started coming to an end.

Talents and Trials.

These are two things that every single one of us has, and we can choose what we do with them and how we handle them. I also believe that they are two of the biggest character builders depending on how we utilize them.

This past year many of the exciting opportunities I had were because I decided to use some of my talents in different ways. I think at times it gets easy to not venture out of your comfort zone in fear of failure. But how will you ever grow if you aren’t allowing yourself to?

Not only did I have many exciting and fun opportunities from utilizing my talents; but I was able to reach out to people I never would have been able to otherwise. I made amazing friends and was able to bless their lives- even if just in the smallest way- because I didn’t hide my talents and abilities. If you think that you have a talent or gift that is unimportant or useless- think again! You weren’t made that way for nothing, so really consider what you can do to utilize it and to touch others lives for the better. For example.. if for some reason you are just so good at cleaning toilets, I have four! You would make me so happy if you came over and used your great ability! See, so worth it.

But in all seriousness- my whole life I had really been intrigued by fashion and beauty. And the last few years I have really enjoyed it and thrived in the artistic side of it. For a very long time I thought that I was prideful for enjoying fashion.. it must mean I’m a bad person or something! So.. I didn’t really do anything about it. Til the House of DVF casting started and I decided to apply on a whim, not thinking it would go anywhere. Well.. it went somewhere. Maybe not exactly where I thought it would go, but I can tell you that I can’t imagine where my life would be had I not tried to follow through with that talent of mine. However dumb, or bad I thought it was, I was so greatly blessed. I still can’t believe where my life has taken me since then.

I can also tell you that from using my talents.. a whole slew of trials tagged along. At first I was bitter about this. Why me? I won’t survive this. What do I even do?? It just didn’t make sense. And honestly it never would have made any sense had I not turned completely to God to get me through it all. It is funny to me that God is the not only the one who gets you out of trials.. but He is the one who gets you into them. There was a point in my life where I felt like maybe God didn’t love me and that was why he wanted to give me a hard time. But I soon came to realize that it was because He loved me that He gave me afflictions. He didn’t want me to stay where I was, because He knew I had the potential to learn, grow and become a better me. Now as I look back I also can see that He knew once I passed through my hardships that I would be a much happier girl. I don’t think I have ever been as happy as I am now! And I am so insanely grateful for everything I went through, and still go through. Because I know for a fact that there are always better things ahead.

Look at yourself and your talents and trials. What are you doing with what you’ve been dealt? Are you hiding them away, or are you sharing them? Please share them. It helps people like me know that I am not the only one trying to struggle by, we are all in the same boat. And we all have abilities and experiences we can use to help the people around us.

I’m going to share some of my favorite and not so favorite moments of 2014 with you now in photos. Lets see what I can rummage up.

I made new friendships, and met some amazingly talented people

I strengthened old friendships and had so much fun in the process.

I was able to spend a lot of quality time with my sweet family

I said goodbye to my baby brother for two years

Said goodbye to someone I planned on spending the rest of my life with

And had to say goodbye to my sweet sweet grandpa

Became an aunt to the best nephew in the world

I pretended to be a model

Brandon Cruz Photography

Lauren Lu Photography

Jordan Carli Photography for Jacobs Scarves

Vania Stoyanova Photography

Lauren Zurchin Photography

Also pretended to be on a reality tv show in New York

Made (or tried to make) some new art

Experienced so many beautiful places

Goodness. That was a lot. I doubt anyone enjoyed that or cringed as much as I did. So much good, so much bad. But I can’t help but smile at the beauty of it all and that I got to experience it.

I can’t wait for what 2015 has in store. Bring it on. I’m pretty sure I can handle whatever comes my way this time..I’ll keep my fingers crossed at least!

I know that the things I experienced were unique to me, but I sincerely believe that all of us travel through good and hard times. I also know that everyone has the capacity to learn so very much from whatever they face. I challenge you to embrace your talents gifts and skills this year, and to share your experiences with those around you. Step out of your comfort zone to be a better you, whether it be in your relationships, schooling, work or something completely different! And always keep your head up and remember there are always better things ahead than anything you leave behind.

Here’s to another great year… aahhhh!

Aaannd sorry I didn’t include any new photos and clothes. I decided to save those for my next post, where I will also talk about some things I learned from beautiful Kier from House of DVF.

Thanks for reading/ looking at so many never ending pictures that you probably could care less about!

Buh-bye for now.

Codi

The things that matter most.

3 Replies

Merry Christmas Eve! Or Happy Christmas Eve! Or as my dad would say “Wait, where is Christmas Adam?”

I’m still surprised it is Christmas tomorrow (or today depending when you’re reading this) and there is no snow.. I was just out playing in the sprinklers a few minutes ago. That’s a lie, but still.. I want some snow!

So this week was the Finale of House of DVF. I still can’t believe it is all over! The whole experience changed my life in so many ways. It was one of those pivotal moments that set me on a completely different path than I ever thought I would be on. I know the same goes for all of the other girls, and I am so grateful I had to opportunity to meet them. I am so excited for Brittany! She is going to be one aaammmaaazing Brand Ambassador!

She is perfect.

Also my whole outfit is Shabby Apple!

I’ll be writing about Brit and the finale in a later post! Today I am going to talk about my girl Lenore.

As I got to know the girls, I immediately felt a close bond with Lenore. I don’t know if this was because she is so personable and funny, or because I feel like her relationship with her family is similar to mine. Well, it is probably both reasons! She is also such a sincere and genuine person, she never could say anything rude or condescending about anyone; it is just not in her nature, she really cares about people. And I have a hunch that a big reason she is like this is because of her family.

Whoops my hand is photobombing!

When I met Lenore she mentioned how the first thing she was going to do once we were done filming was call her mom and tell her all about her day- because she is her best friend. I really admired that! I think it is such a rare thing to find people who have such close bonds with family. I know from my experience that a big reason I am who I am is because of my family. And I know that much of Lenore’s fabulous self must be a result of her sweet family as well.

I had to add this picture too because I found it online hahah.

Like Lenore, I’ve gone my whole life with the the greatest best friends in the world- my family! They have always been there for me through thick and thin. We’ve gone through struggles and yucky stuff, but that is what life is for. I could never imagine being without them. I have had people in my life who have tried to diminish my relationship with my family and the people I love. I’ve even put myself in situations where I take my family for granted. Though these things were not fun.. and I was really dumb.. I am glad I experienced them, so now I remember how valuable my loved ones truly are.

The last few months I have been really trying to find myself.. all while trying to date. It’s so strange to be living the single life again, and honestly I am not the best at balancing my priorities. I miss parts of being married.. I miss always having a companion. It’s been a struggle to try and take things slow and relaxed because I want more than anything to find the person I am supposed to end up with. I used to think I was such a patient person.. pppfffftt.. yeah right! It all sort of sucks (sort of = TOTALLY). But yesterday as I was trying to give myself a pep talk I remembered what got me through the horrible process of divorce- my family, and Christ. How dumb could I be? Once the divorce process was over I sort of just fell back into my old habits of trying to do things myself, and not relying so much on Christ. I also started spending tons and tons of time on dates, instead of with my family and close friends. Though this kept me distracted, it didn’t truly make me happy or complete. So I thought- why now, as I am in a tiny slump that doesn’t even compare to the suckiness (yes, it’s a word) of divorce, am I just relying on myself to get by?

I think at one time or another we all believe that we can overcome our trials and hard situations on our own. Or it is the opposite and you lose complete hope in yourself that you will ever get past what you are going through. I’ve experienced both of these. I am not saying that it is impossible to get over barriers on your own, or that there aren’t trials in life that will go on for looooong periods of time. But I do know that whenever I center my life, thoughts and actions around Christ, I am able to overcome anything and am never alone.

I am so grateful that we have Christmas to remind us of our elder brother Jesus Christ. Obviously I needed this reminder- that He lived so we can truly live and find happiness. Life gets busy and distracting, other times we get lazy or get into routines that don’t allow us time to think and study about what truly matters. It is sad that that is how life goes, because we should treat everyday like Christmas. We should always keep our loved ones as close as we do during the holidays. We should always have Christ and his example alive in our hearts and in our actions each day. And we should always have hope that if things are looking down, they will get better if you have your sights set on the right places.

I had the honor of snapping some photos in some cute clothes today. Although it looks like it was a nice warm day in April.. can someone tell Jack Frost we are waiting for him, and if he is any later he can consider himself fired?

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Shirt: Thrifted- Sorry it was a handmade find!

Tights: Merona

Shoes: Vince Camuto (old)

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Tights: Merona

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Coat: Vintage Makoff

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Shirt: Thrifted

Tights: Merona

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Dress: Trixxi Girl

Tights: Merona

Necklace: Katie Waltman Jewelry

Coat: Vintage Makoff

So there you have it. Some cute clothes. I really enjoy the holidays because it is also a prime time to wear pretty things!

But ultimately like I said before, the very best part of the holidays is Christ. Our Older brother, who lived and died for us all so we can learn, grow and find true happiness. Because of Him we have the chance to love and cherish our families, whoever they may be. For some it might be friends and others it might be relatives. But we should all remember who and what really matters. After all, in the end a pretty dress, a cool car, or a buttload of money isn’t going to matter. The relationships we had and the people we loved will be what counts. We should all treat every day of the year as if it were Christmas. And remember that when we let Him in to our lives we are NEVER alone, and can get through anything that comes our way.

Like C.S. Lewis so gracefully said:

“Look for Christ and you will find Him. And with Him, everything else.”

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Codi

Do what you love!

4 Replies

First I’d like to apologize for a couple of things:

1. I’ve dropped the ball. Yes, I am a slow poke and was supposed to write this post a few days ago. But then finals and work happened and I almost keeled over and died. So here I am, late. But still keepin on!

2. I don’t know why I said I’d like to apologize for “a couple of things” because really that is the only thing I am apologizing for…at least at this time.

You can see me right there in the green. It’s really how I feel lately.

First of all. I would like you all to know I just typed out my entire blog post. Only to have my internet freak out.. and it ALL got deleted!! Wow why is everything against me right now? Am I not supposed to be a blogger? Will someone tell me what my future holds?

Ok so hi! Here I go again. As I was saying, I’ve been swamped with homework, finals and work. This past week I thought back to the very moment I registered to go to the University of Utah. In 2010 I was sitting in Moscow, Russia on a very balmy day. Well.. if you consider being so cold that your nose hairs freeze balmy weather, it was extremely balmy. I was Skyping with my parents as they helped me get my photos together to put into a portfolio to take up to the U. I remember feeling SO stressed (probably similar to how I just felt when my whole post got deleted..) I just had so many worries on my mind. “Well I probably shouldn’t major in Fine Art.. that won’t make me enough money.. I need to do something that will be harder for me.” and “The program takes four whole years to complete? I am going to be 198 years old when I graduate, my children and my children’s children will be there to see me get my diploma, and then they will fly home in their hover car.” But ultimately I gave my parents the green light to take my portfolio to the school.. I was going to do what I loved.

As I’ve gone through the process of finding what I love to do, it’s been important for me to learn as much as I possibly can. I’ve always felt that education is such an important thing. Over the years I have had so many people ask me why I would go to school for fine art. “You already have a nice camera, and why waste money on going to school when you are already good at it?” This bothered me so much. Yes, school is expensive, and yes there are many things you can learn on your own outside of a classroom. But I wouldn’t take back a moment of my schooling. There are so many things that I couldn’t have learned any other way than through my college experience.

I had reservations about studying something that had a reputation of producing a bunch of poor, starving hipsters.. I was seriously torn; I thought I should just study something that could make me rich, and make me sound one million many more smarter. But I knew that the Fine Art program was right for me; and I was going to do my very best and work my butt off. I think this decision was one of the most important I’ve ever made. I have learned so much through my college experience, and it had effected my life in so many ways since the very first day. I know that I was given my talents and gifts for a reason. I am a huge advocate of doing what you love, and growing your talents to their greatest extent. When you do this, doors will open; you will meet people you couldn’t have any other way, and you will be directed down an awesome path made specifically for you.

Shortly after I started my artistic journey, my two sweet children came into my world; aka my laptop and my camera. Since they are so near and dear to me it’s always been important to keep them safe; I have had some really beautiful laptop bags over the years. At one point I carried my laptop around in a bag that looked like a giant diaper and said something like “Orthopedic Surgery” on it. Lets just make it very clear I have always been so very stylish!

Before I went to New York I stumbled upon a shop called Fullgive here in Salt Lake. I was immediately super impressed by the quality and originality of their handmade leather goods! Scott from Fullgive made a custom laptop bag before I set out on my House of DVF journey, and I can safely say I have never been so in love with a bag!

Bag: Fullgive

Dress: Trixxi

Scarf: Unknown brand, found similar here

Leggings: Similar found here

Shoes: Not Rated (old)

It sure means a lot to me to be able to do what I love. And I don’t think anyone fully understand how important my laptop is to me. It holds all of my school work, photo work and… life! It sure is nice to have a rad bag that reminds me of how lucky I am to be able to do what I love.

So I know I am behind- but I’d like to tie my girl Abs from House of DVF into this post. When I think of going for what you love I think of this girl. She is such a go getter- and has come such a long way in her life and career already. She has such a diverse range of talents- from design, to acting.. but my favorite quality about her is her amazing sense of humor. I’m pretty dang sure that she made me laugh more than anyone else did from House of DVF. I don’t get how she does it, but she is just so funny!

Babe status.

I am also so thrilled to see where she goes with her career. When we were back in New York shooting promo shots, Abs told me that she was getting her reels together to get more into her acting career. I know she will be so successful! I couldn’t act to save my life! She has also designed some freaking amazing clothes.. that I would be happy to take off her hands if she ever needed to get rid of them for some mysterious reason.

Seriously though? Ok.. coolest skirt ever!

I could go on and on. Her hair- yes. I was always jealous, she always looks like a model. Also she wraps turbans like a champ.. refer back to episode one of House of DVF and you can see her work her magic on Tiff and I.. haha! I could not pull that turban off like she can.. no way! So basically I just think she is amazing. And ultimately am super impressed by her go getter attitude and confidence; she will go so far. Just look at what she has accomplished by doing what she loves and challenging herself every day.

We should all be more like her.. and get out there and be our very best selves! That’s how you get the furthest and reach even the furthest seeming goals.

So please- go do what you love and be confident in it! Gifts and talents aren’t meant to be ignored, they are meant to be used and grown.

In closing, I’d like you to know how impressed I am in myself that I just re-did this entire post after it got deleted. I think I will go do a small jig now. Waaahhhooo!

Thanks for reading!

Codi

i am codi

life, art, & fashion

Tag Archives: clothes

I am still here! Let’s talk collaborations…

Goodbye 2014!

The things that matter most.

Do what you love!